Episode 9: Life happens—navigate pivotal moments for your business and family

Oscarlyn Elder:

It takes a lot of effort and often a singular focus to build a business. This focus can drive a company’s success but can also mean that when you have a big opportunity—say, an offer to sell your business—you’re not totally ready for the company’s transition. And neither is your family. We call these pivotal moments.

To make the most of them, you and the people you care most about need to prepare, not just for the business transition but also for personal life after the pivotal moment. Because the more prepared you are, the more satisfied you’ll be with the result.

I’m Oscarlyn Elder, co-chief investment officer for Truist Wealth. And this is “I’ve Been Meaning To Do That,” a podcast from Truist Wealth, a purpose-driven financial services company. Thank you for joining us.

This episode is the next in our “Life happens” series. In episode eight, we talked about the need to prepare for unexpected events to help make sure you meet your financial objectives. Business owners need to do the same thing for their company, themselves, and the people they take care of.

And in just a moment, I’ll talk to two Truist Wealth leaders who are focused on making sure their clients are ready for these pivotal moments. Before we get started, if you want to take notes on today’s episode, we have a worksheet you can download and print. You can find it at Truist.com/DoThat.

I have two guests today from Truist Wealth. First I’d like to introduce Lee McCrary, head of the Strategic Client Group. Lee’s team supports clients and advisors as they prepare for pivotal moments such as selling a business. Welcome to the podcast, Lee.

Lee McCrary:

Hello, Oscarlyn. It’s really great to be here with you today.

Oscarlyn Elder:

My other guest is David Herritt, head of the Center for Family Legacy, which helps families live out their shared values and purpose as well as prepare future generations to be responsible stewards of wealth. Hi, David.

David Herritt:

Hello, Oscarlyn. Thank you so much for inviting me.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Absolutely. Lee and David, let’s take a moment to talk about your purpose. Lee, let’s start with you.

Lee McCrary:

Thanks, Oscarlyn. You know, my purpose is to create an entrepreneurial environment that sets our teammates up for success as they define it. So I genuinely believe that when our teammates are set up for success, our clients will be set up for success.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Thank you for sharing that, Lee. David, how about you?

David Herritt:

Yeah, so my purpose involves really leading with honesty and transparency to foster an open and collaborative environment. And it includes my motto of not letting being good get in the way of being great. I think too often that we rest on our laurels and we become complacent, and we forget to always strive to be better every day in every aspect of our lives.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Thank you so much for sharing that, David. Purpose is very important to Truist Wealth and to Truist. We’re a purpose-driven financial services company, and so we like to start the conversation there.

Let’s explain what we mean by pivotal moments or business transitions. These are significant transactions that transform your business and often create wealth for the owner and their family.

Lee, what kinds of events are we talking about?

Lee McCrary:

You know, selling the company is often the first example that comes to mind. There are several other types of transitions, though, that can create value and be life changing for the owner and their family. It could be a merger. It could be a joint venture, selling a percentage of the company to a minority investor or bringing on a new majority investor partner, transferring ownership to employees or family members, a change in the company’s capital structure to necessitate growth financing, or a distribution to the owners. Any change in senior management—oftentimes we see leadership pass on to the next generation. These are all types of transitions that are pivotal moments for an owner.

Oscarlyn Elder:

And so essentially, these pivotal moments are key moments in the life of the business, key moments in the life of, really, the business owner’s journey and their life’s work, where there’s often a monetization event that’s occurring. It may take different forms, but often there’s a significant monetization that’s occurring.

Is that a fair way to say it?

Lee McCrary:

Absolutely. I think that’s a very accurate statement.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Lee, business owners are constantly responding to changes in their business and the marketplace, right? It’s kind of Business 101. The world is constantly changing. How much mindshare does preparing for these pivotal moments have in their daily life?

Lee McCrary:

Yeah. You know, we often talk about business and family being two sides of the same coin. And most business owners that we work with have a lot to say grace over when running the business: taking care of their teammates, their employees, their suppliers. And oftentimes their family needs, their personal needs, their financial needs take a back seat.

And what we know is that often business owners will experience a pivotal moment on average every five years.

Oscarlyn Elder:

It’s actually fairly common that business owners are going through these pivotal moments. However, it sounds like often they don’t have the mindshare to think about the personal aspect of these major events.

Lee McCrary:

That’s right, and so what David and I enjoy doing most is working with these business owners to help them understand the importance of placing their own interests and their family’s interests, their personal wealth interests, on equal footing with the business interest. So again, they can live a life well spent at that point in time in the future.

Oscarlyn Elder:

And it strikes me that in talking with both you and David in the past, I’ve heard you all mention that often after these pivotal events, that what you’ve experienced is business owners who actually regret not being more aware at the beginning of the pivotal moment—kind of the potential impacts.

And part of what we’re trying to do here is increase awareness and enable and equip business owners to use regret avoidance for their benefit. So we’ve explored this in a prior episode, I believe it was episode four. We talked about regret avoidance and how often regret avoidance can drive decision-making.

And specifically, business owners can use it to their benefit. And that if they have an awareness that this is often a neglected area of focus and a source of regret down the road, just having that awareness can help them hopefully shift the focus up front so that they can use regret avoidance to their benefit and, you know, tackle the appropriate planning ahead of time and not get behind the eight ball, so to speak, from the beginning.

 David, what would you add to this?

David Herritt:

Yeah, so I think you hit on a very important point, Oscarlyn, and that is that, you know, these transactions take one or two years to complete, and it really encompasses a lot of different things that are occupying the owner’s time. And that includes, when you’re thinking about a merger and acquisition, legal and accounting issues, valuing the company, thinking about how you’re going to do some cost cutting, maybe increase efficiencies, strengthening relationships with your companies, your suppliers, your employees. And what we found is that many of these middle market leaders really have a do-it-yourself mentality when it comes to many aspects of running and growing their business.

In fact, there was a 2022 study by the National Center for Middle Markets that said 90% of middle market firms rely on their internal resources and only a handful believe that they don’t have what it takes in-house to execute a successful transition. So as a result, too often the owners are really underestimating the amount of time and energy that they need to expend. And given all that focus on the business transition and the compressed time frame, they feel rushed through the process. And so not enough time, as you were saying, is really being spent on these personal aspects that are going to be most impactful post-transaction.

So you think about, financial capital issues like estate planning and income tax planning really should be done far in advance of the transaction, but they’re not really focusing on these areas. And then they’re not even thinking about, as they transition from a business-owning family to a family that’s now owning liquid assets, what does that mean and how do you get prepared for that?

And equally as important is preparing all of your human capital in your family for those roles and responsibilities of that post-transaction life. So, you know, what does that mean, to think about how you’re going to manage your assets after the transition versus how you were running your company before the transition?

Oscarlyn Elder:

Yeah.

Lee McCrary:

You know, David, it strikes me, as somebody who spent 20 years of their professional career working with business owners advising on business issues, it really struck me when we concluded that research and discovered that the number one regret of business owners post-transition was that they wish they had spent more time on their personal wealth transition planning.

That really struck me.

David Herritt:

Yeah.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Yeah, it’s very powerful. So, I mean, we’ve identified—we’ve quantified—that this is an issue for business owners, that they’ve said, “We did not spend enough time.” We want folks to know that we would prefer that folks prepare ahead of time and that they not experience that regret.

When you all are working with a business owner and their families through this type of transition, is there a framework for how you think about the process? David, you’ve talked about there being often a long lead time. Often the businesses are under-resourced to focus on the business transaction.

We’re actually suggesting that business owners open the aperture and focus not only on the business, but also on the personal at the same time. What’s our framework for how a business owner may visualize this process?

David Herritt:

It’s a great question, and as they’re preparing for these emotional, pivotal moments in their lives and thinking about what life looks like after the transition, we try to have the families think about, as I was saying earlier, that transition from a business-owning family to an enterprise-owning family and thinking about the framework, the decision-making mechanisms, the structures that you may want to consider putting in place.

And it really has similar tenants to operating a business. You wouldn’t operate your business without a mission, without an organizational design, a strategic plan, a way to vet and evaluate top talent, creating the succession plan. So why would you leave your family enterprise to chance and not try to use that same methodology with your personal assets?

And what it really can help do is clarify the roles of all the family members and how they’re going to implement into this family enterprise. And it could be structuring a family office, it could be creating a family foundation, running a family council, just helping to advise on the pool assets.

What you’re really trying to do is maximize the human capital and the intellectual capital within your family.

Oscarlyn Elder:

So there needs to be a strategy and a structure at the end of the day. A strategy and a structure.

David Herritt:

Absolutely. Yeah.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Lee, what would you add?

Lee McCrary:

You know, I think David really hit on it, and it all starts with really sitting down and listening to the owner and their spouse and oftentimes their family talk about their purpose, their priorities, their goals, their objectives. And we oftentimes get too focused on the financial capital aspects.

And what we really discover when we sit down and have these conversations is, the topics that business owners and their families really want to talk about have nothing to do with the financial capital aspects. And so, when David talks about the human capital, all of those things that fall under the umbrella of human capital are things that are related to the family dynamic.

Preparing the next generation and preparing the family to live a life with family wealth are so important. And so we use the results of those conversations to really begin to design the architectural plans, as David talked about, for what that transition plan or that family legacy plan looks like.

And those architectural plans serve as a guide for the rest of the process.

Oscarlyn Elder:

I love that image of an architectural plan. So, I think most folks have probably seen an architectural plan at some place, perhaps for their home or for a commercial structure. But I have a vision of a residential home and the architectural plan, and often there are multiple pages. And what I hear you all saying is, there’s a plan, that there’s a foundation, there’s the outside structure, there’s the inside structure, there’s the HVAC running through, if you will, but it’s not necessarily simple.

It is somewhat complex. And it’s essential, especially in situations where you’ve got significant wealth being created and monetized through a business transition, it is important that you systematically tackle building that architectural plan so that you can really preserve the family legacy over the long term and achieve the family’s goals.

So, with that, David, you mentioned preparing the human capital for life after the pivotal moment. I’d like to ask you more about what’s involved with that.

So, Lee discussed the survey data indicating that business owners often felt unprepared for the effect of pivotal moments on themselves and the people they want to take care of. David, that’s where you and our teammates at Truist Wealth’s Center for Family Legacy really come in and do a lot of work. Can you tell us about that?

David Herritt:

And so, you know, just kind of picking up on what Lee was saying about the focus on the financial capital. You know, we think about it in terms of a sustainability pyramid. And so the bottom of the pyramid is that financial capital work: It’s the estate planning, it’s the investment work, it’s, you know, risk management through insurance and all of those other things.

But for families who are then transitioning, it’s really important for them to think about moving up that pyramid and thinking about, “How am I preparing my human capital?” as we talked about earlier, for all of those roles and responsibilities of making sure that we are doing the best thing that we can do to transition that wealth and to be good stewards of that wealth.

And then, as we talked about, kind of how are we going to govern that framework? It really becomes powerful to think about how you’re going to do your planning, what your goals and objectives are, and then how you’re going to implement around those.

Oscarlyn Elder:

So David, to recap the pyramid, I want to make sure that I’ve got this straight. The first level—the primary level, if you will—is the financial. That’s the first. And then second is the human capital.

David Herritt:

That’s correct.

Oscarlyn Elder:

And then I think you talked about a third, which would be governance. Is that how you’re thinking about it?

David Herritt:

Yep. How you govern your enterprise. Absolutely. Yep.

Oscarlyn Elder:

So we see kind of three tranches within the pyramid, if you will. Lee, what would you add to that?

Lee McCrary:

Listening to David talk about the importance of the human and intellectual capital, it strikes me, David, your team has done a lot of work in this area over the years. And the number one reason families fail to sustain wealth across generations has nothing to do with the financial capital. Isn’t that right?

David Herritt:

I mean, you know, very little, because people know that the financial capital is important. So that’s really where they’re focusing their attention. As we talked about with the business owners, you know, they’re focusing their attention on the transition when it’s happening and not really on their personal.

And it’s the same thing in these cases. You know, the family’s really focused on that financial capital and not focused on that human capital, that intellectual capital, what framework they’re going to put in place to govern their enterprise. And so that’s really where we try to guide them, is to think about all three together, because the financial capital is important. As Oscarlyn just said, it’s the foundation of the pyramid, right? So, I don’t want to discount the importance. It’s just, that’s where the family’s focusing. So, we’re trying to help them focus beyond that financial capital.

Lee McCrary:

Yeah, the family dynamic is so important in this equation.

Oscarlyn Elder:

And so that’s key, Lee. I’m going to connect the dots here. That second layer, we talked about human capital, we talked about family dynamics. Those words to me indicate emotion, right? We’re humans, we’re families. We have lots of emotions typically. Let’s talk about it for a second, the emotional impact of these major pivotal moments, especially for the business owners that you’ve worked with.

David Herritt:

Yeah, I’m happy to start, Lee, you know, because I think you hit on something really important that you talked about with that financial capital, is that, you know, people don’t focus on these emotional impacts, but when you are exiting a business, it is a significant life event. And, you know, we all know that change is difficult no matter what change it is.

And, you know, I was looking at that same middle market study that we referenced earlier, and it said that almost nine out of 10 business owners have positive emotions after the sale of the business. They’re elated. They’re relaxed. There’s a sense of relief. At the same time, four out of 10 also continue to report negative emotions, including sadness, guilt, anxiety, as Oscarlyn referred to, regret. There’s a true sense of loss, right? And they’re figuring out how to replace that. And so, you know, you have to start to think about those issues and how that’s going to impact you and not just focus on kind of, “How am I optimizing the sale of the business?” “How am I optimizing my estate plan?” There’s all these emotional pieces that play an important role.

Lee McCrary:

Yeah, we often talk about that transition plan as time and money, right? So that business, that enterprise oftentimes is the source of intellectual stimulation, of fulfillment, of community engagement for that business owner. And when that business is gone, or no longer dominant in the owner and their family’s life, as you said, David, they need to replace all of that. And that’s really where the listening, the purpose and priorities conversations, help begin to design the framework for what life after that event looks like in order to create that fulfillment.

Oscarlyn Elder:

David, let’s talk for a minute about the areas that you’ve seen families often need the most support in after this business transition, after this pivotal moment.

David Herritt:

Yeah. So, you know, in working with families over the last 30-plus years, we’ve identified six nonfinancial areas of focus that have emerged as kind of the key priority topics that we like to advise and consult on with our clients. And those areas are: family cohesiveness, governance, strategic planning, philanthropy, mentoring, and trusts and estates.

Oscarlyn Elder:

OK, so six main areas that folks need assistance with. Can you double-click into maybe two or three of those areas and give us a more specific taste of what that actually looks like in practice?

David Herritt:

Yeah, I’d be happy to. So, let’s talk about family cohesiveness first. And we’d like to focus on shared history, culture, understanding your personal and your shared values, and using those shared values as a springboard for creating your purpose, your mission, your vision of what you want to accomplish as a family.

So, I think that’s one important area. Teamwork and communication. Lee said earlier that, you know, financial capital issues are not kind of the biggest driver in these areas. And what really is causing families to be unsuccessful in these transitions is a breakdown in communication and lack of trust within the family as the families continue to grow.

And then kind of thinking about the well-being of each family member, stressing the importance of physical and mental health. I was in a meeting a couple of months ago, and a matriarch said to our family, “We’re having all of these important conversations about the future, but if we don’t have our health, like, what does this really mean for us? Like, what is the future without health?”

So, as you start to move through the generations, from the first-generation matriarch and patriarch to the next-generation sibling partnership and then on to the third-generation cousin consortium and beyond, it becomes more difficult for the families to stay connected, because they’re not growing up in the same household.

So, it’s harder to connect back to that shared history. So, one of the things we like to do is storytelling, because there’s a lot of richness in storytelling. So, a few years ago I assisted a family in identifying their shared values and creating this values-driven mission statement. And one of the exercises we like to facilitate after we do that is bringing in the rising generation of the family to share those values and mission. And this family had five generation-three family members who at the time of this exercise were between the ages of 10 and 16.

Oscarlyn Elder:

OK. In generation three, let’s explain what that means, because I think bankers speak, we understand, but help us think through that.

David Herritt:

Sure. So, the first generation, matriarch and patriarch, kind of, are the people who kind of start the generations, right?

Oscarlyn Elder:

Create the wealth.

David Herritt:

Right. And then the second generation are their children, the siblings, that sibling partnership I talked about. And then the third generation are the cousins, right? They are the children of the siblings. And that’s how you get to the third generation.

Oscarlyn Elder:

OK. Sorry to interrupt.

David Herritt:

No, that’s a good explanation. So, at this meeting, the grandmother said that her most important value was responsibility, and she shared a story about how her grandmother and grandfather started the family business at the turn of the 20th century.

And when the Depression hit, they eventually ran out of corporate reserves, and for nine months they had to pay their employees out of their personal savings in order to keep the business viable. But in order to do that, they had to make some sacrifices. And one of those sacrifices was the fact that they had to eat stale bread and moldy cheese for every meal during that nine months. And so the grandmother then retreated back into her kitchen and came out of the kitchen with a sandwich that was cut into five pieces of stale bread and stale cheese, and she made each one of her grandchildren eat that. And the impact of that was so amazing to see. And that’s really where that richness in the storytelling comes and finding that connectivity back to the business that created the wealth.

I want to talk about under mentoring, a little bit of wealth literacy. And I’m not going to spend a lot of time out of this, because you did an excellent job in episode seven around preparing your teens with money lessons. But I just wanted to say that there are some studies out there that say only a small percentage of high schools are even offering classes on financial literacy, and the 18-to-24-year-old age bracket is the fastest-growing group filing for bankruptcy in the United States today. So, some of that is student loan debt, but it’s also not understanding credit, not how to build and stay within a spending plan. So that’s really important.

And the last one I want to end with is under trust and estates, and that is communicating intentions. We talk about how important it is to have a succession plan, and it is, but it’s also important to be able to communicate that plan down to future generations. And what I find is, many senior family members are afraid to do that, because they’re afraid it’s going to act as a lack of an incentive and potentially lead to entitlement.

But I can tell you on the flip side, it can also lead to family members not feeling valued, or worthy, or trusted. And I can guarantee you that when there’s a lack of information, each family member’s going to create their own narrative and expectations. And when those expectations aren’t met, it’s going to lead to disappointment.

About five years ago, I had a patriarch of a family that I was working with who died, and his wife had predeceased, and the time came to divide the personal property that was remaining. And the will said to divide it as equally as possible, right? And so the executor went and created a list of all of the items and their intrinsic value. And I facilitated a conversation with the five adult family members, the siblings, about what was the best way to go ahead and divide this property. And they all agreed. And by random draw, the oldest daughter got the first pick. So, she’s looking around the room and all of a sudden she points to a painting that’s over the fireplace and she goes, “I want that.”

And so I quickly scan the list and I don’t see it on the first page of items based on highest value, so I think we’re off to a great start. All of a sudden, her younger sister just goes totally ballistic. She’s like: “Of course you got the painting. You always get what you want. Mom and Dad liked you best. All I got were your hand-me-down clothes and toys. And in high school you stole my boyfriend!”

Now, these were 50-year-old women, right? And so we can never underestimate the importance of communication and making sure that people understand what you’re trying to accomplish and who’s going to get what. So, I just caution that those are really important conversations.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Two takeaways that I heard from that really vivid description of family priorities in general. Importance of communication throughout. It may be in cohesiveness or mentoring or trust and estate planning, but communication is a foundation that runs through them all. And so communication and intentionality. And again, I think it goes back to the vision that you all gave us of the architectural plans, the architectural structure. There’s intentionality, there’s a foundation. It’s not happenstance. It is very deliberate—it should be a deliberate exercise over time to build that really strong structure that stands the test of time, which is what we want for our families, to stand that test of time.

David Herritt:

Absolutely.

Oscarlyn Elder:

All right. So, there are many considerations for business owners when they’re executing pivotal moments. Next, let’s talk about some of the first steps to help them get moving.

So far, we’ve discussed the business and personal aspects of pivotal moments. Now I’d like to drill down and talk about the first steps business owners should take. Lee, what do you suggest as the starting point?

Lee McCrary:

Yeah, Oscarlyn, I think it’s so important for that business owner to assemble the right team of advisors. You know, go back to that middle market research that we’ve cited often in this conversation today. And one of the things we observed, that we talked about, was that the number one regret of business owners post-transition was that they wish they’d spent more time on their personal wealth preparation.

And yet when we interviewed these business owners and we asked them what advisors did they have on the team, they most often cited their accountant, their CPA, their attorney, their investment banker if they used one, and a business consultant, which oftentimes business owners use. But they didn’t have wealth professionals at the table.

And so we found that paradox to be quite fascinating. And so I think it’s so important for business owners to establish good relationships with the right wealth professionals and have them at the table with their advisors, and they have to be intentional about it. You know, it’s really hard to build the right team.

You think about a business owner who has a business to run and family to take care of. And again, back to taking care of teammates and suppliers, you know, building a team of advisors and being intentional about it is quite hard. But the business owners that do that are far more successful and far more satisfied.

Oscarlyn Elder:

So Lee, what we learned from that survey is that many of these business owners did not have wealth managers at the table with them. And also, you found that regret was high kind of after the transaction because there had been some neglect on the personal side. And just trying to tie those two things together, what you’re recommending is that wealth managers be at the table as early as possible when there is this pivotal moment.

David, what would you add to that discussion?

David Herritt:

So, what we often find is that these professionals end up working in silos. And to what you said earlier, Oscarlyn, about the importance of communication, communication is very important here to make sure that all of the advisors are speaking, they’re acting in a coordinated way, so that we can find the full range of solutions and really optimize the solution for the client and figure out a way for that to be a much more coordinated effort instead of kind of individuals working on kind of their areas of expertise.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Do either of you have a case study, a client situation that comes to mind where the client really benefited from the integrated approach of the team?

Lee McCrary:

Yes, you know, a recent situation comes to mind, Oscarlyn. We have a client who made a decision to exit their business. They were going to sell. They had an investment banker, an attorney, and a CPA at the table helping to advise. And this was really the culmination of, in many respects, the life’s work of this business owner. So, he was an entrepreneur, and it was going to be a very emotionally and financially complex transaction.

And we had an opportunity to sit down with that business owner and bring a full wealth team. So, a wealth team that could help not only think about planning and preparation and navigating the transaction, but also address the financial capital dimensions—the trust and estate planning, the cash flow forecasting—and then a team that could help address the human and intellectual capital dimensions of what life after the event was going to look like. And when we put that team in front of the business owner, it really changed their perspective on how to think about preparing.

And we started simply with that listening session: talking about goals, objectives, purpose, and priority. And from there we were able to help define those architectural plans that we talked about, of what that transition plan was going to look like. And then as you begin to navigate the actual transaction, the event itself, it becomes very important to get tactical. You have to not only maximize the transaction, the value of the transaction, but you have to maximize the net proceeds. Oftentimes, the highest value for a business doesn’t always translate to the highest net proceeds to the owner and their family. So, there’s a lot of work that goes into that.

And then we transition into life after the event, and that’s where David’s team really picks up.

David Herritt:

Yeah, thank you, Lee. You know, one of the things that was really important to this client was, he had two young adult daughters and he wanted them to make sure that they were prepared for this life after the transition. And one of them actually was going to get married very soon, and he wanted her to have a prenuptial conversation with her fiancé.

And she was very nervous about that. And so we really helped her prep for that and how to have that conversation. And then we worked to create education plans for each one of them, specifically around what their roles and responsibilities were going to be as beneficiaries of a trust now that there were going to be trusts created. They didn’t understand what that meant, to be a beneficiary, how they interact with the trustee, and kind of how that whole process works. So we helped them with that.

And then both of them were concerned about having a better understanding around investments, because now there were going to be investment assets out there. And so we spent a lot of time helping them with that area. So that was two of the areas we really helped them with. And I think something that was really important here was that we set up monthly meetings with the family just to make sure that we were kind of all on the same page on all of the different kinds of things that were going on during the process to make sure we were executing in the best way for them.

Oscarlyn Elder:

So, David, you and your team really wrapped around the family to help them through this extended transition period.

David Herritt:

Absolutely. Yeah.

Oscarlyn Elder:

So, David, kind of the bottom line: How should business owners start thinking about preparing themselves and the people they want to take care of for a pivotal moment?

David Herritt:

Yeah. For us, we really think it begins and ends with values and understanding your personal values, but also the shared values of the family and how that will translate into that purpose, vision, mission that we talked about earlier.

And I know in episode three, “From Objectives to Priorities,” you talked about the importance of values, because there’s a lot of different ways that you can get to your values. You could use values cards, you could use a paper assessment that has the values listed on it. We use a proprietary online assessment that we have all adult family members take, which can identify their core values both individually and for the family, and use that assessment to create the mission statement we talked about.

And this assessment was created using the research of two of the leading value theorists in the world at the time, Benjamin Tonna and Brian Hall, and they identified 125 different values that a human being could possess. So you can get a feel for, you know, maybe somewhere between, you know, thinking about 30 values to all the way to 125 values.

So, there’s a lot of ways to get at it, but we do think that that’s really important, is to start and end with your values. And then I would just add onto that, thinking about how and when and what you want to communicate. And we talked about that importance of communicating intentions and why people are reluctant to do it, but we believe that this is really a lifelong endeavor consisting of communicating those core values. But also modeling behavior and thinking about taking advantage of teachable moments, because this will really lay the groundwork for these important conversations to come. And it’s just important to understand that this is not a one-time delivery. It’s going to take place gradually over time in an age-appropriate way.

Oscarlyn Elder:

So, David, point of reference for folks: Episode three that you noted, episode three has a downloadable PDF that includes 30 values. So, your team does a deep dive on values that I think includes over a hundred, a proprietary application. It’s a very sophisticated, deliberate, intentional process.

If folks want to get an early jump-start on that and have a sense of where it may go, that PDF can serve as a guide and can be helpful, too, in the process. And, of course, your team does go deeper, because again, you’re dealing with multiple generations and over a longer-term horizon, if you will.

David and Lee, thanks so much for bringing your experience to this important subject.

It’s been great to expand our “Life happens” series to include pivotal moments for business ownership. If there’s one idea we hope people take away from this episode, it’s that for many business owners, business and personal life are intertwined, and when they navigate a pivotal moment, they need to consider what life will look like after the business transaction.

David and Lee, I’ve really enjoyed our time together. Before we go, I’d like to ask each of you this question: What’s the one thing you’ve been meaning to do but haven’t done and will commit to do in the future?

Lee McCrary:

You know, Oscarlyn, I’m a walking example of why it’s so important to focus on your personal wealth preparation. You know, our family had an unfortunate life event about seven years ago. And we’ve gotten sidetracked over the last seven years focusing on other things. And so, to all the examples that we talked about today, life gets in the way, business gets in the way, and then time flies by.

And so my wife and I have committed to sitting down and re-engineering our retirement planning, our estate planning, and making sure that our children are properly set up the way we want them to be. We’re long overdue to address it. It’s been almost seven years now.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Thank you for sharing that. Thank you for that vulnerability and sharing, letting us in on your to-do. David, what would you want to mention?

David Herritt:

You know, like Lee, you know, we talk about this work, and we don’t do it in the way that we talk about it. So I’m a bit embarrassed to admit this out loud, especially with all the emphasis I just placed on the importance of communicating intentions, but I still need to have that conversation with my adult children.

My wife and I have spent a lot of time on what we call our, in quotes, just-in-case book, which outlines our wishes and identifies assets and where they’re held and passwords and all the important documents, key advisors, et cetera. But I’ve yet to communicate that to my children, and my children are all adults.

And so my wife is constantly reminding me, “You do this work every day for your clients, why can’t you do it for us?” So that is my to-do, and I need to be better at setting that time aside.

Oscarlyn Elder:

It’s great hearing from both of you what you’ve been meaning to do. I need to update everyone on my key item that I have been working on for a number of months. And that is my husband and I have finally signed our estate planning documents, so they’ve been completely refreshed, and we’ve updated all of the beneficiary designations for all of our accounts. So retirement accounts, investment accounts, checking accounts, life insurance—it’s all updated. It’s completely done at this point, and I have a huge sense of relief putting a big check mark by this important to-do.

David and Lee, thank you so much for joining me today.

Lee McCrary:

Thanks, Oscarlyn, this was such a great time. Really appreciate you having us on.

David Herritt:

Yeah, I just want to say my thanks, Oscarlyn. This was really a lot of fun. I really enjoyed it.

Oscarlyn Elder:

Thank you for joining us today.

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